Imbolic Success!

So, the local pagan group celebrated Imbolic early, specifically this past Saturday. There was a healing energy workshop before, where we worked on feeling energy and even touching on the chakras, which is something i've been wanting to look into. I won't publicly go into what i felt from my partner, though I do want to discuss it with my Lady at some point, but the fact that I felt anything at all was pretty cool. (However it's not the success I referred to.)

After that was the ritual. From what I picked up (and can remember, half a week after the fact), Imbolic is about healing and renewing, with spring having already come over the horizon and visibly heading our way even if it's not here yet. So the ritual's meditation involved visiting the goddess Brigid, visiting her home and checking myself against her various implements.. (i remember her swords for sharpness of mind and the fire of her forge for passion and drive, and there was a spring and a flower, but i don't remember what they were compared to). While I do remember that I didn't feel i passed any of them, I know that I'm slowly working towards getting better. It's just a damned roller coaster I have to ride to get there.. i get out of a spiritual and mental doldrum only to find myself flying at breakneck speed and holding on for dear life.

However, the success that I want to talk about is what happened early on in the meditation. It opened with me walking through the forest at night. How something like this typically plays out is that I will see it in first person view, looking through my own eyes into a hazy setting. I don't see myself well, if at all, in anything that I pass. What made this time different was that as I was walking through the forest, I actually pulled back to a third person view. I was very hazy, but, for the first time, I saw myself explicitly as a woman in my mind's eye. It didn't last long, and I couldn't see myself clearly enough to describe myself more than "a woman" but I felt that was something. Maybe trying to see myself is something i should work on. *shrugs* dunno, but i'm a happy kitten for now.